Gift Shops

The whole idea behind a gift shop is that people want to buy presents for their friends and their relatives and the high school girls they're stalking, but they won't bother to shop for said presents in a store that sells anything they'd actually want to buy themselves. Gift shops, then, exist only to sell stuff no one would buy on their own. Then why does anyone shop there at all? "Oh, thank you so much for this bag of potpourri whose only purpose is to sit on an end table and smell. I've always said I need more olfactory stimulation while I'm sleeping and therefore am unable to appreciate it!"

The initial idea behind gift giving died decades ago. It was replaced by a new idea: If it serves a purpose or performs a function in any way, it is not an appropriate gift. The new mantra of gift giving is now "Give someone something they wouldn't buy themselves." Now, I'm willing to admit that the spirit of that mantra is one of... shall I say... whimsy. A decent theoretical re-interpretation might be "It's only a good gift if it's something the receiver enjoys but would consider too flashy or expensive to buy on his or her own."

That's all well and good, but it has nothing to do with reality. If a gift shop is sticking to its title in spirit, then a gift purchased there is, by definition, utterly useless. If they sold stuff that could be used as anything but a gift, they would cease to be a gift shop. They may as well sell hugs.