Girls Are Icky

I haven't said or even thought that phrase in a long, long time. Probably since first or second grade. That doesn't make it any less true. Male/Female Comm made me want to bite a couple people's heads off today. Some people are so incredibly stupid, it makes my left eye twitch a little.

Don't you hate it when someone's talking to you, and they assume that because you're not punching them in the face that you actually care about what they're saying? So do I. Hey, girl who always sits to my right in that class, please lower your voice when you tell everyone around you that Mondays are your busiest days of the week. If I cared any less, I'd be peeing on you right now. What? You mean you don't pee on people you dislike? Is that just me?

To the girl who always sits to my left: It's pronounced "irrelevant," just like it's spelled. I've never before met anyone who has actually pronounced it "irrevelant." You should be hanged.

We were talking about male/female communication and differences in education, and the prof mentioned something about male-biased testing techniques. I had to hold my breath to keep from laughing out loud. Apparently, the all-male testing boards make up questions that would be confusing or downright impossible for women to answer, like, "If Mike has two penises, and Jerry has four penises, and Lorena Bobbit subtracts fifty percent of the total penises in the room, then how many penises are left? *Bonus question: Why was Lorena out of the kitchen in the first place?*" or "Half the urinal cakes in the men's bathroom are blue. The other half are twenty percent pink and eighty percent purple. There are four purple cakes. How many pink cakes are there?" or "Christopher Columbus could reputedly crush a full, unopened beer can on his forehead WITHOUT EVEN TRYING. On a scale of one to ten, how awesome is that?" or even "Should women be allowed to serve in the military? A) No; B) Hell no; C) God no; D) Only if they wear those hot nurses' outfits."