Kinda Mad

As those of you who actually know me in real life can attest to, and contrary to my online persona, I'm pretty much the most non-confrontational guy you'll ever meet. Seriously. Don't laugh. Today was an exception, however. I was hostile and mean and I got all up in everybody's face. In line at the grocery store, a woman walked up behind me and, in an attempt to get me to move forward a few feet so she could get her cumbersome cart through, she said, "Excuse me." I turned around, and with the meanest face I could muster, said, "Sure. You're excused. I don't know what you did, but you're excused, and as long as it doesn't involve me moving, I don't care." She looked at me like I'd just pulled out her spleen with my bare hands (though, it's been years since I've actually done that, and I might have forgotten what *that* face actually looks like). I felt kinda bad, but then I got home and had dinner, which made me happy again.