Little Black Book

For those of you who don't know the true purpose of this blog, I'm trying out some stuff and pretty much practicing to be a humorist one day. I would love that. So, that really makes you my guinea pigs, so to speak. As some of you may know, I've been keeping a notebook on funny little things that happen to me. Gosh, it's been... I guess about three full years in the making. Since this is the holiday season, I'm getting pretty lazy (yeah, on top of how lazy I am normally). So, every once in a while, I'm going to post an idea from my notebook. It's sort of like a "Deep Thoughts with Andrew Handey" time. This is one of those times.

We were buying a car today, and at the dealership, we had to sit around in their crappy little office. The lady who was working out the finances was kinda fat. Anyway, we were getting pretty restless and I was hungry. I wanted to get something from the vending machine just outside the door, so I said something about it. The finance lady said, "Oh, that vending machine outside isn't working right now." Suddenly, I felt this overwhelming urge to walk over to her, pat her stomach, and say, "Looks to me like it's working just fine."