Be Yourself
If there's one thing I can't stand, it's fat people, but if there's two things I can't stand, it's fat people and people telling others to "just be themselves." That's probably the stupidest thought ever uttered aloud, at least since someone once said, "Oh, come on. This is the North Atlantic. There couldn't possibly be any icebergs out there big enough to sink this ship." I guess there are certain dumb things that are just destined to be said. I have been myself for as long as I can remember, and probably for a few years before that. Seriously. Now, maybe I'm just an outlier here or something, but I like to assume that I'm mostly just like everyone else. I'm willing to bet that the vast majority of people around me have, in fact, been themselves for most of their lives.
When you're at a party, and you've been told before that you just need to "be yourself," you're probably thinking it means you have to act like you would around close friends and relatives, right? But what about when you're around people you don't know or just met? Are you being "fake" by staying a little more reserved? Absolutely not. You're still being yourself. It's just the "I only met you forty seconds ago" self, and not the "I know you've seen me cry and/or run laps around your house naked" self. Individuals aren't simple or static, so what makes us think that multiple individuals in a dynamic social situation should be? Don't be stupid. You're always yourself. Anyone who says differently is trying to sell his own self-help books. Or drugs. Turn them in immediately.
Another phrase I heard recently came from a friend over IM. She asked, "Are you around?" I had no idea how to answer that. I said something like, "Of course. I'm always around. Wherever, I go, I'm around." I don't think she liked that very much. I was stumped, though. How can a person even ask that question? Around what? Yes, when I'm someplace, and I'm aware that I'm at that someplace, I am around that place. What information have we gained here? It's like asking people, "Do I know him?" What? How am I supposed to respond to that?
When you're at a party, and you've been told before that you just need to "be yourself," you're probably thinking it means you have to act like you would around close friends and relatives, right? But what about when you're around people you don't know or just met? Are you being "fake" by staying a little more reserved? Absolutely not. You're still being yourself. It's just the "I only met you forty seconds ago" self, and not the "I know you've seen me cry and/or run laps around your house naked" self. Individuals aren't simple or static, so what makes us think that multiple individuals in a dynamic social situation should be? Don't be stupid. You're always yourself. Anyone who says differently is trying to sell his own self-help books. Or drugs. Turn them in immediately.
Another phrase I heard recently came from a friend over IM. She asked, "Are you around?" I had no idea how to answer that. I said something like, "Of course. I'm always around. Wherever, I go, I'm around." I don't think she liked that very much. I was stumped, though. How can a person even ask that question? Around what? Yes, when I'm someplace, and I'm aware that I'm at that someplace, I am around that place. What information have we gained here? It's like asking people, "Do I know him?" What? How am I supposed to respond to that?
posted by Vaughan at
12:47 PM
2 Comments:
As Tom Masson, the poet, once said, ""Be yourself" is about the worst advice you can give some people." I however, happen to be a fan of Oscar Wilde's viewpoint on 'being yourself': "Man is least himself when he talks in his own person. Give him a mask, and he will tell you the truth."
Awesome. Oscar Wilde was great. I think he was even more quotable than Mark Twain.
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