Is It Just Me, Or Could I Totally Pick You Up?

Yesterday, while loading and unloading firewood from the back of my dad's truck, I came to an odd realization. I seem to suffer under the continuous delusion that everything around me weighs just about 45 pounds. Then, I am always shocked and embarrassed to discover that I cannot, in fact, lift everything. I look at a refrigerator and think to myself, "Psh! I could lift that. No problem." I watch some guy on tv struggle to lift a tree branch off his fallen comrade, and I laugh and point at the weak little man. Yeah, I know. It's ridiculous. But so is plenty of the stuff guys think to themselves. I'm just the only one candid enough to admit it. When I walk into a bank, I convince myself that I could easily rob it. When I meet some guy, I wonder just how long I could take a beating from him before running away and drowning my sorrows in a bowl of strawberry ice cream. Trust me, these are things that every guy wonders. We also wonder if we could plan a murder- and get away with it. You know, normal stuff. Sometimes, I watch tv and wonder what the actors are doing right then, completely oblivious to the fact that I can see them now. Maybe I should see a therapist...