Wednesday, July 13, 2005

A Dead Giveaway

You can always tell when someone is about to say something horribly bigotted or racist when they preface their comment with, "Now, I don't want to offend anybody, but..." People do that all the time. Apparently, simply stating that you don't want to offend anyone is a free pass to be as offensive as possible. I don't play that way. If I'm going to offend you, I'll probably keep that bit of information a secret until after I've done it. Then, you won't need me to tell you anyway. Some guys, on the other hand, think it somehow justifies their offensiveness. They'll say things like, "I don't mean to offend anyone, but black people smell weird." or "Now, I don't want to ruffle any feathers, but women belong in the kitchen. Naked." or "I don't want to rub anyone the wrong way, but I think we should nuke Mexico City, and take out all them damn spiks at once. That'll solve our immigration problem." Sorry guys, but you're offending a whole lot of people, and since I'm not one of them, I can only imagine how pissed off I'd be if I were. So, next time you start to say something with "I don't want to offend anybody" in the preamble, please make sure there aren't any (and I don't want to offend anybody when I say this) liberal gay black promiscuous blue-state Jews around. Watch out. They may just get all legislative on your ass, punk!

2 Comments:

Blogger Hehoff said...

The problem is you have to preamble such statements with "Now I don't want to offend anybody, but..." in order to be taken seriously. If I say "the only solution to terrorism is to kill all Muslims and Democrats" no one will take me seriously unless I prefice it with a "I don't want to offend" disclaimer. The problem should be obvious. I clearly do want to offend everyone possible, and I am dead serious.

5:25 PM  
Blogger Vaughan said...

The problem, Geoff, is that everyone is already quite aware of that little preface trick. When people hear it, they know something offensive is about to be said. Simply blurting out a statement that just happens to be offensive may be a favorable alternative.

5:43 PM  

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