Hey Look! I Can Type With My Nose!
I can't express how bad I feel about nearly abandoning this blog in the last few weeks. I haven't really written anything that I've dubbed worthy of this blog in several days. Maybe I'm just going through another creative dry spell. Or maybe I need to just stop being so picky. If this blog were a child, it would have been taken from me in the middle of the night and given to a more loving and nurturing foster author. I can't have that. Everyone knows those foster authors are just in it for the government subsidized check. Here are a few thoughts to curb your appetite until I come back at you with another full post.
I saw a guy in a wheelchair at church today with a bluetooth wireless headset stuck in his ear. Yeah right. Like anyone would ever want to talk to someone in a wheelchair. Give me a break.
Yesterday, I saw about the funniest thing in the world. A woman face planting from a bicycle at nearly fifteen miles an hour. I had to hold my breath to keep from laughing. I should get a medal for that.
I got yelled at by a small Asian woman at King Soopers a few days ago. OK, so maybe I deserved it, but did she really have to call me "whitey bastard"? I hope she gets face cancer.
Why are so many people in my high school graduating class getting married so early? When I get married, I'm going to have prospects, a nest egg, and a firm grasp on reality. How can a 22-year-old guy support himself and his wife while still going to school, and if he's not in school, when is he going to realize that you can't raise a family on an hourly job? Get a degree, jackass.
What is with my generation's obsession with the 80's? Is there really any nostalgic feeling to speak of when you're reminded of the time in your life when you walked around shirtless with a bag of your own crap strapped around your waist?
I actually think the emo movement will end up being beneficial for the world. With all the emo kids out there committing suicide, we're finally weeding out the weak of mind from our gene pool. So go ahead and listen to your horrendous emo music and be depressed about your upper-middle class life and hate your normal, loving parents and wear your mom's jeans. You're doing your part for the children of the future!
I saw a guy in a wheelchair at church today with a bluetooth wireless headset stuck in his ear. Yeah right. Like anyone would ever want to talk to someone in a wheelchair. Give me a break.
Yesterday, I saw about the funniest thing in the world. A woman face planting from a bicycle at nearly fifteen miles an hour. I had to hold my breath to keep from laughing. I should get a medal for that.
I got yelled at by a small Asian woman at King Soopers a few days ago. OK, so maybe I deserved it, but did she really have to call me "whitey bastard"? I hope she gets face cancer.
Why are so many people in my high school graduating class getting married so early? When I get married, I'm going to have prospects, a nest egg, and a firm grasp on reality. How can a 22-year-old guy support himself and his wife while still going to school, and if he's not in school, when is he going to realize that you can't raise a family on an hourly job? Get a degree, jackass.
What is with my generation's obsession with the 80's? Is there really any nostalgic feeling to speak of when you're reminded of the time in your life when you walked around shirtless with a bag of your own crap strapped around your waist?
I actually think the emo movement will end up being beneficial for the world. With all the emo kids out there committing suicide, we're finally weeding out the weak of mind from our gene pool. So go ahead and listen to your horrendous emo music and be depressed about your upper-middle class life and hate your normal, loving parents and wear your mom's jeans. You're doing your part for the children of the future!
posted by Vaughan at
4:06 PM
10 Comments:
So I guess I'm a degree-less jackass, but college gets dirt cheap when you get married.
Ladies and gentlemen, the world's worst reason to get married.
Maybe, but it's also the world's best reason not to wait for the inevitable.
I guess I must've missed the meeting in which marriage was declared "inevitable."
You're being very broad. I'm being very specific. My impending marriage will happen at some point in the near future. The sooner it happens the more money I save on my college education.
That sounds remarkably similar to the "the more I spend, the more I save" philosophy of bargain shopping.
I don't see it. It's not going to cost us anymore to get married now as opposed to a few years from now, and it won't cost me anymore to live after I get married. The only problem arrises if I have a kid. Then I'm screwed.
If I get married now my wedding will cost $x, and my remaining college education will cost $y. If I get married when I'm done, my wedding will cost $x, and I'll still be paying $25y for college. That and if I get married now I will make more money between now and when I complete school. The way I see it, getting married now gets me out of debt at least five years earlier.
Because prices are a universal constant, right?
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Prices of what?
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