It's The Media!

A girl in my male/female comm class gave a speech today in which she tore The Media a new one for showing such blatantly sexist commercials as the Godaddy.com ones from the last two Superbowls. I hate the use of the phrase The Media as some sort of catch-all when blaming something on society as a whole. Society encompasses the speaker, whether or not they're willing to admit it, but The Media, on the other hand, implies a distant, separate entity on whom we can heap as much blame and guilt and corny diarrhea as we want. But enough of my grandstanding. How uncharacteristic of me. You know how much I hate getting all dialectic like that. It's just not me. Anyway, she gave this speech about gender stereotypes in commercials. It was so bad, it gave me cancer on my face. I literally had to avoid eye contact, because I was afraid of the poor speaking ability, bad sense of timing and organization, and horrendous logic somehow rubbing off on me if I engaged it directly.

She spoke about the "research" into trends in television commercials she did, which was mostly just asking a few of her femi-nazi lesbo friends if our patriarchal society was portraying beautiful women more often than men. Surprise! We do. You know why? Because the male aged 18-35 demographic is the one that spends all the money in this country, you fat, liberal, victimized moron. Why would they make commercials that cater to a demographic that mooches off their husbands and spends all their money on diet pills, lean cuisines, baby clothes, and more diet pills?

The other part of the speech was her assertion that The Media are solely responsible for the "unrealistic" images we all supposedly have of women. No. You are. If there weren't any insecure tubs of Crisco like you wining to everyone else about the "unrealistic standards" we're fed by The Media, we'd all be totally content with the way people are portrayed in commercials. If you weren't uglier than a garbage bag full of leprechaun poop and used condoms, you wouldn't be complaining either. Ever notice that? Good-looking people never complain about the "impossible standards" in The Media. That's because ugly people are just jealous. Suck it up.